Jokes

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Jokes

« on: December 19, 2009, 11:12:38 AM »

Jokes

- Man: Is there any way to live longer?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never bother you.

- Different Phases of a man:
After engagement: Superman
After Marriage: Gentleman
After 10 years: Watchman
After 20 years: Doberman

- Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?
It's a formality, just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

- It's funny when people discuss love marriage vs arranged.
It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

- It is difficult to understand God. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into wives!

- A man, who surrenders when he's wrong, is honest. A man who surrenders when not sure, is wise. A man who surrenders even if he's right, is a husband.
Grin

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Ashraf

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #1 on: December 19, 2009, 12:40:56 PM »

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #2 on: December 19, 2009, 03:26:28 PM »

kuch app b sonaien............................... Angry

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #3 on: December 20, 2009, 02:24:25 PM »

haahaahaa...

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"~ Hearts are not to be had as a gift, Hearts are to be earned ~"

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #4 on: December 20, 2009, 02:31:27 PM »

Punishment

A man was sent to Hell for his sins. As he was being taken to his place of eternal torment, he passed a room where a lawyer was having an intimate encounter with a beautiful young woman.

"What a ripoff," the man muttered. "I have to roast for all eternity, and that lawyer gets to spend it with a beautiful woman."

Jabbing the man with his pitchfork, the escorting demon snarled, "Who are you to question that woman's punishment?"
Roll Eyes

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #5 on: December 21, 2009, 09:20:02 AM »

keep it up, nice one

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #6 on: December 21, 2009, 10:13:09 AM »

A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #7 on: December 21, 2009, 10:20:42 AM »

Hahahhhh....

hell to hell is free! very funny joke

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #8 on: December 21, 2009, 10:45:18 AM »

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #9 on: December 21, 2009, 05:37:49 PM »

A Child's Prayer
One night, a father passed by his son's room and heard his son praying: "God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa."
The father didn't quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor of a heart attack. The father reassured himself that it was just a coincidence, but was still a bit spooked.

The next night, he heard his son praying again: "God bless Mommy and Daddy. Ta ta, Grandma."

The father was worried, but decided to wait until morning. Sure enough, the next morning Grandma was on the floor, dead of a heart attack.

Really scared now, the father decided to wait outside his son's door the next night. And sure enough, the boy started to pray: "God bless Mommy. Ta ta, Daddy."

Now the father was crapping his pants. He stayed up all night, and went to the doctor's early the next day to make sure his health was fine. When he finally came home, his wife was waiting on the porch. She said, "Thank God you're here -- we could really use your help! We found milkman dead on our porch this morning!''

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #10 on: December 21, 2009, 05:58:49 PM »

A man was sleeping in his house

Suddenly death angel appeared & said,

“Go Out & Enjoy, Nothing will Happen to you for Next 10 years.”

He did so & met with an accident & died,

In heaven, He asked angel,

“Why you lied to me”

Angel replied,

“Sorry dear, Month End, Had to achieve Targets”

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #11 on: December 21, 2009, 08:09:47 PM »

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saber

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #12 on: December 22, 2009, 10:53:32 AM »

Aik Fakeer bacche se: 5 ropay ka sawaal hai baba...
Baccha: baga baga fakeer k pass aaya aur kehnay laga...
"BABA JALDI SE SAWAAL BATAVO... MUJE 5 ROPO KI BARI SAKT ZAROORAT
HA HA AH HA

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #13 on: December 22, 2009, 03:57:54 PM »

3 Sardaro ko phansi hone lagi
pehle ko phansi lagai to rassa dheela hone ki waja se wo neche pani me ja gira
doosre ko phansi di to wo b pani me ja gira or bach gaya
jub teesre ki bari i to wo jallad se bola bhai ye rassa theak kr lo mujhe terna nahi aata...

Bhikari:
ALLAH k nam pr kch de do.

Pathan 100 ka note dikhaty huy bola:
kia tmhary pas 50 hai?

Bhikari:
khushi se g hain
Pathan:
to kocha pehlay wo kharch kro

A Pathan teacher gives dictation test to students,

Last bench students:

We are not able to hear you SIR,

Pathan : "OK I'LL WRITE ON THE BOARD .,..,..,..,!

1 pathan angoor bech raha tha mgr keh raha tha aaloo le lo aaloo.
2sry admi ne kaha khan saab ye to angoor hai.
Pathan. Chup ho jao warna makhia aa jayn gi.

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Re: Jokes

« Reply #14 on: December 22, 2009, 04:38:02 PM »

Aik dafa aik Molvi marne ki halat me hota hai...
to apni bewi se kehta hai...
k me jab mar javo...
to samnay walo ki aurto ko zaroor bulana...
bewi hairaan ho kar pochti hai...
wo kio bala? Huh

to molvie kehta hai..
k me ne suna hai k...
wo muraday se lipat lipat k roti hai...
Ary Oyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

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